wise words from miss july

miranda july, that is. not like the calendar girl miss july. that would be good, though, if that miss july had anything good to say. or if miranda july was a calendar girl.

“Are you angry? Punch a pillow. Was it satisfying? Not hardly. These days people are too angry for punching. What you might try is stabbing. Take an old pillow and lay it on the front lawn. Stab it with a big pointy knife. Again and again and again. Stab hard enough for the point of the knife to go into the ground. Stab until the pillow is gone and you are just stabbing the earth again and again, as if you want to kill it for continuing to spin, as if you are getting revenge for having to live on this planet day after day, alone.”

are you the favorite person of anybody?

i just caught this short film on new york magazine's vulture. written by miranda july, who just published a book of short stories, the film features an adorable john c. reilly surveying passersby, asking the question, "are you the favorite person of anybody?" the survey-ees include july, herself, along with mike white and the film's cinematographer, chuy chavez.

then, of course, it got me thinking: am i the favorite person of anybody? gee, i don't know.

how sure am i of that? very certain, confident, i think so, not so sure, could be? hmmph. i think so? uh, what was the one underneath that?

miranda july is the coolest person i know

or don't know. i mean, i know of her, i don't know her personally if that confused you. anyway, that makes her the coolest person i know of.

her new book of short stories, aptly entitled "no one belongs her more than you", is getting rave reviews. she even made an awesome website for it called noonebelongshermorethanyou.com. and the book even comes in two different colors, yellow and pink:



i am having deja vu...did i already post about her new book? when i posted that short film she made with john c reilly in it? anyway, i have made a few phone calls and finally have someone holding the book for me. get your copies NOW!

apparently she had a reading that no one told me about at the Hammer Museum on the 16th!

if you're in new york, she has a reading TONIGHT (the 22nd) at 192 books on tenth ave and 21st street. you have to call (212.255.4022) for reservations. and this friday (the 25th) she will be at the New York Public Library on 5th ave and 42nd street with special guest david byrne!

i have to stop blogging, i have an appointment to pick up her new book in ten minutes!

joanna newsom hates bears

In the current edition of Purple Fashion Magazine, which I finally bought for myself, there is an unbelievably quirky "piece" on one of my favorite folkies, Ms. Joanna Newsom, written by another favorite of mine, Miranda July. The piece was so quirky that I felt the need to share it with everyone, and since it's not available online, I will make it available here:

True or False: When Joanna Newsom takes out the trash, she clangs the trash can lids loudly to scare away any bears that might be in the area.

True or false: Joanna Newsom takes out the trash.

True or false: Bears.

When Joanna plays with the London Symphony Orchestra next year she will wear:
a) Jeans.
b) A real nice vintage gown.
c) You, gutted. (Your friends will be amazed to see you up there, playing the harp so hypnotically. They didn't even know your were musical.)

True or false: You.

Now then. Are Joanna's skin, hair, and eyes basically all variations on the same color, and is that color the color of a deer, and is that deer standing by a river, very still, listening?

No, the deer is crashing through the woods, at breakneck speed, but not in fear.

It runs past death and insults and caring.

It keeps on going.

It's gone. She's the color of a gone deer.

When she sings that part about "filling her long ears with beads," "long ears" is a metaphor for
a) A vagina
b) A vagina
c) A vagina

Or, is she saying bees? Long ears with bees. That's probably it. Nevermind the previous question.

In any case, my God. My word. My oh my.

True or false: Stunning.
True.

birthday gifting

i put together a crafty gift box yesterday for my best friend's president's day birthday. included were goodies from bedford cheese--a hunk of manchego and another of humboldt fog (that's cool for goat cheese), homemade wild blueberry jam from sidehill farm, rosemary crackers, and a little dollop of nutella. i also got a nifty cowgirl card from catbird, a pair of ranunculas from sprout, and there's a miranda july book tucked away at the bottom called learning to love you more, found at spoonbill & sugartown.

my idea for the box came from a recent trip to marlow & daughters, where they had put together "valentine's day packs" on slabs of cardboard that included an assortment of items from their shop that would provide for a nice, simple dinner for two.

what i ended up buying there looked like this (after i marinated it):



i mistakenly bought 1 1/5 pounds of faux rib-eye, as we called it, for 2 people. half of it is now resting gloriously in my freezer. but more on that later.