Hideous Kinky

Watched Hideous Kinky last night to get me pumped for Morocco. I like the way Kate sleeps with her hippie daughters. That's how I'm going to sleep with my little girls when and if I have them.

Sofia Strikes Back

Eager for this.

Swimsuit

Bought a brand new bathing suit today for the first time in years. Seriously, maybe 4 or 5 years. Isn't it adorable?

mermaid dreams

i've always wanted to be a mermaid. like that darryl hannah shit. give me a tail, i'll go swim with humpbacks in a second.



thanks, sar!

Love Me, Please Love Me

When I was 17, I adored a boy who was my best friend at the time. He was four years my senior, finishing college as I was finishing high school. I had strong feelings for him for nearly a year, but he didn't like me back. We spoke on the phone incessantly, took long rides together, and I went to every one of his band's shows. We were attached at the hip. Once, I house-sat at his apartment while he went away for the weekend, so eager to do him the favor. I took care of his cat, laid on his couch, slept in his bed. That night, while messing around on his desk, I found a note indicating that he was actually visiting a girl named Pauline a few towns away, whom he was having a secret tryst with. I was heartbroken. I went into his kitchen and found some vodka and gulped it straight from the bottle. Around that time, the Dreamers had come out and needless to say, I became obsessed with all things French. The song above was on the soundtrack and I was so taken by it. My crush, an excellent piano player, would play it for me and he could actually hit the high notes. I was impressed.

Later that summer, I traveled through Europe with another friend for six weeks. I had gotten over my crush by then after another heartbreaking prom experience and instead fell head over heels for some Norwegian guy I met in London (and then a Swedish guy I met in Paris...) Anyway, during my last days in Paris, my traveling companion left early and I met up with my former crush in Paris. He was staying at a flat all the way on the south side of town by the university with three Brits--a brother and sister, and another girl who was somehow romantically linked. He invited me to stay with them for my remaining 2-3 nights.

I remember it rained during those last days and the flat had a skylightm so this large, airy apartment was cast with a cloudy light and the feeling of rain. We stayed inside as if all of Paris was in the apartment instead of the streets. We made spaghetti for supper, played games, and all splayed out on the floor, listening to this song over and over again. Needless to say, it was bittersweet.

me in Paris the following summer, after freshman year at college, photo appropriately taken by my then latest boyfriend, an Italian

Perfection

My friend Jen, who recently re-vamped the layout of her lovely blog, recently posted this Elizabeth Gilbert article on perfection. I'm not really an Eat, Pray, Love kind of girl, but I read Gilbert's portrait of Eustace Conway as the last American man back in September, and I dug it. I'm also procrastinating at work with a computer in front of me, so I decided to read it. And does it speak the truth or what? Since I have more or less conquered the threatening hurdle of my anxiety in my ongoing therapy sessions, we now have a new persistent topic that we keep returning to: my incessant yearning for perfection. Gilbert really hits it on the nose with this one. I'm the type of girl who reads the New Yorker while running on the treadmill right before my yoga class at least two times a week. I'm also trying to write a play, produce a short film, build an acting career, work on two scenes for my weekly scene study class, save extra money for two huge summer trips, exercise 4-5 times a week, eat healthily, cook as much as possible, go to movies, read three magazines a week plus 2 books and 2 plays, learn guitar, learn French and Italian, work on the web design for the cafe in Los Angeles, hold on, wait, I have to slow down. I need a cup of coffee. Too many things. Did I mention lose 10 pounds? Thanks, Jen.

24 hours to go

I'm leaving to Korea tomorrow morning!

I'm putting in a final few hours at work, then running around frantically for a few hours with last minute errands, and then finalizing my packing--including downloading new jams and podcasts to get me through the 13 hour flight! (Any recs?)

Then in the AM, B and I are going to a much-awaited breakfast (after this past weekend's vegan juice fast), then we're taking a zipcar to the airport!

Here's a sneak peek at opening ceremony red carpet outfit:

Sun and Rocks

via olivia malone

I love this photograph. I'm yearning to feel what she's feeling. It strikes a memory in me, one I haven't felt yet but expect to feel (as if memories and times were cyclical), of how I'll feel when I get to Morocco. I'll sit on a beach in Tangier just like that a feel freedom and happiness and achievement.

B and I finally bought our guidebook. We're inching our way closer to Africa day by day. Have been looking into all the affordable riads we can stay at. Mesmerizing.

Mom

This is what I want to look like when I'm a mom.

Jane Birkin, via the thinking tank

blossom

wow.

via ginny branch

The Best Thing

One time my boyfriend sent me this song with a kiss and made me swoon.

The Secret Garden

Do you remember The Secret Garden? Meryl & I sure do... Check out our blog for hints as to what we're working on.

I'm Talking to You

via what anna loves

Our Sunday Supper

This weekend, I tried my hand at Suzanne Goin's actually famous braised beef short ribs recipe from my favorite cookbook, Sunday Suppers at Lucques. As expected, the ribs turned out splendidly, and the rest of the meal was a success as well. I was having my boyfriend's family over for dinner at my apartment for the first time, including his parents, his sister, and her fiance. I was prepping for the occasion all week, pouring over cookbooks, scribbling menus and grocery lists, and rotating between the kitchen for work and the couch for napping. I was very excited about my menu and thrilled to be cooking from Goin's book again, which I had previously taken out from the library and had a tough time returning it, even three months late. Anyway, I am still reeling off my exhaustion and am not keen on typing out the recipes here. However, I will gladly give them to anyone by request and can suggest you look at the re-typed recipes I found via google, although be warned that they are mainly adapted versions of the original.

The menu:

Wild Mushroom, Young Onion, Gruyere, and Applewood Smoked Bacon Tart (adapted from Goin's tart)
Mozzarella topped with Olive Oil and Sea Salt, served with warm, crusty bread (This was intended to be burrata, but it turned out that the cheese I had purchased was already spoiled! Boo!)
----
Homemade Pumpkin Ravioli with Sage-Hazelnut Butter
----
Braised Beef Short Ribs with Swiss Chard
Served with Root Vegetable Mash & Horseradish Cream
----
Billy's mom brought an amazing Coconut Cake with Chocolate Chunks

Quick roasting cippolini onions with salt and thyme.

Seasoning the thyme-marinated short ribs with salt and pepper.

Browning the meat.

Caramelizing the mirepoix -- the base of the braising liquid.

Adding balsamic vinegar, red wine, and port to reduce, then adding beef stock.

Covering the meat in the braising liquids. Now it goes in the oven for 3 hours!

Wilting swiss chard with the cippolini onions.

Mashing the orange zest-flavored root vegetables.

The Italian diligently making pasta sheets after a failed attempt the day prior.

Breaking out the ravioli attachment for the first time! Pumpkin, parmesan, ricotta, and nutmeg filling.

Success!

The most delectable and surprising tart. Puff pastry topped with a ricotta-creme fraiche base, topped with sliced gruyere, then sauteed wild mushrooms, green onions, and thick-cut bacon.

Pumpkin ravioli topped with browned butter, crispy sage, hazelnuts, and parmesan.

Platter of ribs, sitting atop the chard and topped with the braising liquid.

Dinner!

The End.

Valentine's Day

This Valentine's day:

+I received the most beautiful flowers to this date in my life next to an old-fashioned looking love letter.

+Ate a crowded brunch at Diner.
+Played with puppies. Lots of expensive puppies.






+Strolled through a wintry Central Park and drank hot chocolate.


+Braved ice skates under the city lights.




+Ate the most marvelous dinner at Roberta's in Bushwick, aided by our waitress and dearest friend, Meryl. Spicy mixed olives, Italian meat plate, Pork Chop with guanciale and farro with winter greens, pizza with guanciale again and cheese and egg, and apple cobbler.

Women

A friend of mine did this, cool! Good job Mackenzie!

A Love Letter

A week before the battle of Bull Run Sullivan Ballou, a Major in the 2nd
Rhode Island Volunteers, wrote home to his wife in Smithfield.

July 14,1861
Camp Clark, Washington DC

Dear Sarah:

The indications are very strong that we shall move in a few days - perhaps tomorrow. And lest I should not be able to write you again I feel impelled to write a few lines that may fall under your eye when I am no more.

I have no misgivings about, or lack of confidence in the cause in which I am engaged, and my courage does not halt or falter. I know how American Civilization now leans upon the triumph of the government and how great a debt we owe to those who went before us through the blood and suffering of the Revolution. And I am willing - perfectly willing - to lay down all my joys in this life, to help maintain this government, and to pay that debt.

Sarah, my love for you is deathless, it seems to bind me with mighty cables that nothing but omnipotence can break; and yet my love of Country comes over me like a strong wind and bears me irresistibly with all those chains to the battlefield. The memory of all the blissful moments I have enjoyed with you come crowding over me, and I feel most deeply grateful to God and you, that I have enjoyed them for so long. And how hard it is for me to give them up and burn to ashes the hopes and future years, when, God willing, we might still have lived and loved together, and see our boys grown up to honorable manhood around us.

If I do not return, my dear Sarah, never forget how much I loved you, nor that when my last breath escapes me on the battle field, it will whisper your name...

Forgive my many faults, and the many pains I have caused you. How thoughtless, how foolish I have sometimes been!...

But, 0 Sarah, if the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they love, I shall always be with you, in the brightest day and in the darkest night... always, always. And when the soft breeze fans your cheek, it shall be my breath, or the cool air your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by.

Sarah do not mourn me dead; think I am gone and wait for me, for we shall meet again...

Sullivan Ballou was killed a week later at the 1st Battle of Bull Run.

via ginny branch and via here

10 Things About Me

So, here's the deal. My computer crashed last Friday. Or something like that. The video output was faltering. Common speak: my computer crashed. It's been in the shop since Saturday morning thanks to my getting it there by sprint-ing in freezing cold weather with an inflexible pair of tights under my jeans, only to find out that they weren't going to look at it until Monday morning. Only to then find out on Thursday that it would have to be mailed in to Apple for a repair. Only to find out that I wouldn't have it back for an addition 5-7 business days. So, that's my excuse for not blogging. I'm lucky enough to have e-mail access on my phone, or else this post would consist of me raging through the keyboard. What little time I have had on a computer has been spent doing really important things (like joining twitter.) And since my time is now limited, after having spent the last 3o minutes trying to figure this twitter thing out and calling my boyfriend for assistance, I have to be brief.

An update on all fronts:

1. I got a new job, kind of. I am assisting a working woman from her home on the UWS. The hours aren't secure yet, but I'm working on it. This is great news for many reasons. Cue sub-list:

a) because I have been looking for a job since mid-October

b) one of my resolutions was to start the new year with a new job

c) I am dead-broke, haven't even been able to properly buy groceries in nearly 3 weeks. Ate cereal for dinner several evenings in a row

d) I have estimated that I need to come up with $1500 to set aside throughout the course of the year to enable my yearning to embark on three trips: mid-winter Caribbean, Morocco (and maybe Israel!), and Burning Man.

2. I have been doing pretty, pretty, pretty well with some of my other resolutions (daily vitamins, exercising 4x/week)

3. I am taking 2 evening classes a week through Monday (and then one permanently). This makes me very busy and very tired.

4. I wrote and performed a monologue in one of these classes. And people laughed, so I think it was funny.

5. The other class makes me nervous as all hell.

6. Meryl & I have been writing together 2-3 times a week, doing our best to bring the world our first play. It's been very fun so far and we laugh a lot.

7. I am putting in extensive work on the cafe/boutique my family is opening in L.A. I am managing the design front (in-store and web), assisting plan the menu, and researching the merchandise for the boutique.

8. I took my fat cat to the vet. Finally. She weighs 18 lbs. and I can hear her snoring loudly from across the apartment as I type.

9. My boyfriend gifted me a beautiful guitar for the holidays. I am eager to start learning all of the Paul Simon songs in the world.

10. I have a gift certificate to Williams-Sonoma that I am keeping for myself as a little treat.

I am so looking forward to this weekend. I cannot wait to sleep in tomorrow and maybe cook myself a real meal. I will not have a computer in my possession at all times, so please excuse me if my presence over the next week or so will be slight. The absence of a computer is nice, I have to say. I watched a movie one night and read magazines in my bed another night. This week, I'm hoping to maybe finally get my hands on Celine and Julie Go Boating--a 1970s Jacques Rivette film I've been eager to see. Viva Vena Cava recently posted some photos from the film and re-inspired me to sit down and watch it. So, high hopes for the week to come. Maybe I'll even learn to play a little diddy.

Sneak Peak Keep

Here's a sneak peak into the Keep shoot I was just talking about...